I deserve better.

That's the point of this post.

I'm tired of getting overlooked for the wonderful person I am.
I'm tired of meaning so little to so many people.
I'm tired of not being loved.
I'm tired of being so angry at a world that never appreciated shit.
I'm tired of missing/losing opportunities because I'm just not _______ enough. (Whatever the fuck ____ means)
I'm tired of feeling like a second class citizen.
I'm tired of pity.
I'm tired of being ignored.
I'm tired of not being good enough.
I'm tired of being used.
I'm tired of having everything I feel good about stolen from me.
I'm tired.

Sick and fucking tired.

I want to put a bullet through my head, and I still can't do it. I made a promise and I keep telling myself that it will be better someday. Someday will come and people will see what wonderful things they missed. I only think that it will happen after I'm gone, kind of like an artist.

Maybe that's just a delusion. Maybe I just have nothin'. That seems more likely these days. I'm only wanted by the users and abusers out there. I really would like to curl up in a ball and have someone whisper in my ear that they could take all of the pain I feel in my chest away.

But there's nobody here.

Fuck, I really deserve better.