Monday, November 21, 2005

Bah Humbug, Pt. 3

Here's my final bitch session about Christmas. As much as I've been tearing down the people who go completely nuts over it, I really need to point out the people who are Christmas haters.

Last year in one of the suburbs of Milwaukee, someone threw a huge fit at their son or daughter's school. They were singing Christmas songs for their Christmas concert. Gasp!

Of course, the reason they were offended officially was because most of the Christmas songs have references to Jesus and God, and it was a public school. You know, this psychotic parenting scares me. I agree that there's a separation between church and state, but these are songs that this kid has already heard hundred of times in his life, and it's not like they are handing out bibles with the fucking songs. Most schools can't even call it Christmas break anymore. They have to refer to it as Winter Break. The Political Correctness Police need to shut the fuck up, I'm thinking.

The place I used to work for before my current job was doing the same damn thing. Instead of calling the holiday "Christmas", they wanted to be politically correct and call it "December 25th Day". What. The. Fuck?

I heard a story of a mall in California where people were protesting because they had a mall Santa Claus. Someone got a bug up their ass all because Santa is supposedly a Christian icon that promotes their religion. These days, Santa is more a symbol of the how Christmas became a way to get people to spend money more than anything else. Corporate greed is the name of game here. How can you get pissed at Santa, anyway? He eats shitloads of cookies, and gives out lots of gifts. Sounds like my kinda guy.

So as a wrap up, here's my Christmas Commandments-

1. Thou shalt not decorate or promote Christmas before Thanksgiving.
2. Thou shalt not annoy the shit out of Erik with your insanely excessive holiday glee.
3. Thou shalt not cover thy house in a ton of tacky Christmas crap.
4. Thou shalt not cause power outages or temporary blindness with your light display.
5. Thou shalt not be a whiny bitch about Christmas being a religious holiday. It isn't anymore.
6. Thou shalt not piss off Santa.

Spread the Commandments and educate the masses.

3 Comments:

At 6:54 AM, Blogger cosmopolgirl said...

people really do freak out, don't they? Personally I'm jewish and I could care less whether you call Dec. 25...christmas, as long as I get the day off!!!

 
At 1:22 PM, Blogger Hey Jo said...

I love your Commandments! One to add... 1. Thou shalt take down your crappy Christmas decorations no later than Jan 7th. I don't want to see your Christmas lights still on for President's Day!

 
At 11:48 PM, Blogger Erik said...

Yard decorations come inside by the First weekend of the new year. Lights can stay on the house, but you are not allowed to turn them on at all. Living in Wisconsin, I wouldn't want to be standing on an icy roof taking down lights. Leaving them on a timer past New Years day is grounds for forcible removal.

 

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