Billboards I'd like to see, Vol. 1

Being on the road so much, you see a lot of ads on billboards. Most are dumb, but there are a few gems. I found a few faked ones that are so good, I had to share. Enjoy.

On that note of frivolity, I'd like to take things down a notch. My days with my current job are now officially numbered. I got the finalized proposal for how they are going to transition my job. Effectively after the first of the year, they are going to pay me my current salary divided 2080 (the number of work hours in a year) per hour. The problem with that is that they will also be setting in place rules to making the 40 hours needed per week impossible if I am at home for a week. On weeks that I am on the road, I'd have to get permission to work overtime. Yeah, that'll work. "I'm sorry Mr. Smith, but I'm at 34 hours for the week and I have a 6 hour drive home, so you'll just have to figure out how to send electronic claims by yourself." When did every company in America get taken over by asshats and accountants?

I really should start a consultant business. I could go in and teach these morons that they can run all the focus groups and meetings they want, but what the really need to do is to get some real experience before making all of these dumb assed decisions. I'd walk in with a rolled newspaper to their business meetings and when one of the idiots says something stupid, I can smack them in the nose with it. You are an accountant, not a (insert job here). You don't even work at their location. Since you are a dumb ignorant fool, you are going to go over there and talk to the people in the trenches. Then maybe I'll let you draft a memo after that. I wouldn't be the consultant they wanted to get, but I'd be the consultant that they needed.

Anyway, I better start working on the resume. I have a few ideas of what I will do, but nothing concrete yet. I'm probably going to have to spend all tht money I've saved up for a possible house on a car, insurance and all that fun. I feel like I'm going to have to take a step backward here, which is pissing me off. I want to move forward in a career instead of falling back and looking for a new opening to run through. I'm tired of renting, too. If I could've put all the money I've been spending on rent on a house, I'd have a hell of a good investment nearly paid off.

Oh well. Either way, I'll get back on my feet. Eventually I'll make some forward progress, too.